Wednesday, March 9, 2016



This word seems to be replaying in my head over and over again. I don't know about your world but it seems once I start thinking of something that thing begins to pop up all around me, so graciously posing the question "okay so this is your reality and so what are you going to do about it?"

I was looking on Instagram and saw a post that went like this "feeling overwhelmed? Here's a tip--Just smile... for no reason at all." Another day goes by leading me to talk and meet up with friends and it seems to be a trend in their world too, this overwhelming feeling. Another day goes by I go to work engaging in conversations with college students saying "I finished college, now going on interviews and these jobs are wanting 5 years of they just forked out thousands of dollars to go to college, spent the last however many years attending school and now places want 5 years of experience in the workforce...OVERWHELMING, right? We all experience these overwhelming moments in many different ways shapes or forms.

Last night I vomited on my husband not literally but figuratively speaking. I poured out my thoughts and emotions about feeling overwhelmed. There definitely was some tension and friction as I expressed my world to him. He so graciously heard me out and said "I love you." Not really the words I was looking for because let's face it as a woman in an overwhelmed state of mind "love" just an't the cure. OR IS IT?

Hear me out for a second. My marriage isn't perfect. I can already hear woman saying "gosh I wish my husband told me after I vomited on him that he loves me." Let me say this, my husband and I learned years ago, VERY early on into our marriage to create a safe place. What is a "safe place?" Well it's a place that we created to allow each other to be real, honest and very open about the reality of life. At first THIS "safe place" was SO hard. We argued...A LOT. Have you ever heard the saying "things get worse before they get better?" Yeah well, that was the case. Our safe place was worse before it was ever able to get to get better. BUT if you can push through the worst, the reality is you will experience something better. It takes a lot of practice but it only works if you keep doing it over and over again. Anyway, this is not a marriage blog but somehow I felt this was all worth sharing. Let me just close out this thought by saying this, Ryan and I did not create this way of communication on our own. We had help. LOTS of it. I've mentioned two people's names before in a previous blog "The Process" and I will mention them again. Our very dear friends Sean and Lina Flannagan help people discover their "safe place" as individuals and as a couple and I will swear by their technique till the day I die. It's available to anyone, so if you want it here is their info.
Contact: Solid Life International @ 

So back to feeling overwhelmed.

After my little pow wow my husband and I went to sleep. This morning, I dropped off my girls at school. My last stop was my daughters preschool and as I walked up to drop her off her teacher right away asked "are you okay?" (Yeah I'm THAT person who wears my emotions on my sleeves.) My response "I just have a lot on my mind, I have a ton to do and don't know where to start." Her response was "start with what needs to get done first, whatever needs your attention first is a good place start and everything else will get done one way or another." That right there resonated with me so clearly.

So instead of moving on with my to do list I did the necessary duties and took a pause out of my day for me. I turned into my favorite spot and got me a Mocha and an San Diegan Omelet at a near by coffee shop and allowed myself to express all my thoughts on paper. What needed to get done first was to feed my body and soul. I've learned a lot about myself by doing this. I know this may not be the case for you. Your world may look different than mine. There was a time when I had NO time whatsoever to take a morning to myself let alone even a couple hours. I was busy taking care of a newborn, running a ministry, planning event after event, and my time was swallowed by a million other projects. There are times and season where your world changes. You may have a couple hours to do certain things and then you may have no hours to do anything. The key is "what are you doing now to feed your body and soul?"
Is it taking an hour to go to a gym, stopping through the drive through to pick up your favorite drink at Starbucks, is it calling your best friend for 10min, is it reading your favorite book until you fall sleep at night, is it studying a course that will get you to where you want to be. These things won't FIX the overwhelming feelings but it will fuel you to push through those overwhelming moments that don't seem to end.

When we recharge ourselves the better we will be able to face these overwhelming moments to realize they aren't so overwhelming at all. I love how simple the Instagram post I stated earlier put it "smile, even if you don't feel like it." HA. Right? Try something that doesn't necessarily feel like the thing to do but it's the necessary thing to do in order to fuel you to moving forward.

Friends, don't let the overwhelming moments overwhelm you. YOU have the power to overwhelm those moments with the overwhelming greatness that YOU ARE! Create space in your world for you and love yourself. My husband's response by simply saying "I love you" made me think not only does his love matter in my world but my love toward myself matters too. Take time to love on yourself today. You are worth it and your overwhelming moments will appreciate it.

Have a great day my friends.